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Is Respite An Option for Punishment?

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What is Respite? Respite is an option used in foster care to give foster parents a needed break from the challenges of parenting a child they didn't birth. Foster parenting can be even more demanding than traditional paren- ting depending on the child's behaviors and needs. It can take not only a physical and emotional toll but also a spiritual toll. In foster care when we want to utilize that option we simply make a call to our agency contact give them the dates needed and they arrange for another foster parent to have the child during that time. We personally have taken respite calls from as far away as 3 hours. It also provides an opportunity for spouses to reconnect and spend time with each and keep their marriage strong. Using respite is a great tool and should be utilized however, when it used to punish the child that is where I disagree. We have taken in children for multiple reasons and a common one is where the foster parent is mad at them for some behavior or action a...
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The Trouble with DCS and What We Learned from our First Girl Placement

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  Well, some good news for those that have kept up with us concerning our "heartbreak" kid.  Recently my brother and sister-in-law decided to get out of town for fall break and it was also during the time of my wife's birthday (turning another decade older) so we had to celebrate the occasion some way.  Our choices were Florida, Myrtle Beach, and an area where Z calls home.   The choices were equally in the air. The only difference was the comfortability of pulling a camper to those places and of course extra costs for entertainment.  They have two younger children and after our limited experience in Foster care we now understand that providing outlets of entertainment can be paramount for one's own sanity. It was eventually decided to go to the area where Z lives (I was just as happy going to the beach and working beside the ocean for the week.  The trip to Florida would have been tricky as I would probably have to be working while driving and I wasn'...
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Heartbroken - Attachment - And Loss

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  ---Warning----Long Post----You May Cry---- First, I apologize in advance for any spelling errors or grammar mistakes but I am sure you will understand the spirit and intent of this post.  Really it is a therapy letter for myself and you are invited on this journey with me. Our intention was never to become so attached to a child that we would feel the emotional grief others had warned us about when beginning this journey unless it was OUR CHILD (meaning they were available for adoption).  How naïve, I know.  I had thought I had safeguards in place to protect against that.  But I failed to acknowledge the possibility of what we just went through over the last couple of weeks. The safeguards we had placed were that since we began this journey with the intention to adopt we were only looking at those kiddos that would be placed in our care that would not be returning home to their birth parents, meaning they were in full state guardianship.  However, to get ...
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